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Lance F#%*ing Stephenson
No caption necessary The Minnesota Timberwolves have signed journeyman, famous ear-blower and Dion Waiters soulmate Lance Stephenson to a 10-day contract. On the surface, this seems like it has no...
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Karl-Anthony Towns Should Be An All-Star
You made his cat sad. Photo from nbacatwatch.com There’s been some vicious snubs in the world lately. Donald Trump’s replacement pick for National Security Advisor turned him down because he doesn’t...
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I Hate Golden State Warriors “Fans”
A Golden State Warriors fan celebrates having finally sold all his Miami Heat gear. Photo from media.10news.com Fuck Golden State Warriors fans. Warriors fans outside of California are like Canadians...
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Minnesota Timberwolves’ New Logo Isn’t Great, Doesn’t Suck…Whatever. It’s Fine.
I’ve been freaking out in excitement about the new Timberwolves logo for a while now. This was our chance to really rebrand ourselves as a cool franchise, which isn’t easy for a team whose solution to...
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Grading the Timberwolves’ Offseason
Photo from twitter.com/Timberwolves I literally say this every year, but WE ARE GOING TO BE AWESOME THIS YEAR! Every time I’ve said that in the past has been a bullshit lie and I knew it. I mean,...
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L.A. Lakers Wear “MPLS.” Jerseys In MN, Piss Me Right The Hell Off
AP Photo/Jim Mone In case you didn’t know, the Los Angeles Lakers used to be the Minneapolis Lakers. Granted, this was back when it was almost all whites dudes and people still played with peach...
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The Minnesota Timberwolves Still SUCK (Don’t Jinx It)
I’m convinced that God hates Minnesota. Maybe it’s because we have a town named Odin? Maybe he hates the Mall Of America because having four magnet stores is the modern day Tower of Babel? Maybe he...
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Timberwolves Trade Deadline Wishlist
Many of you know that February 8 is the NBA trade deadline. What many of you DON’T know is that February 8 is also National Iowa Day. As the fourth most famous Iowan (after Ashton Kutcher, Tom...
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Putting In As Much Effort As The Timberwolves
I’ve been a fan of the Minnesota Timberwolves since 2002. I saw some good years, then sat through a decade and a half of BDSM with all of the bleeding and none of the enjoyment. I went to games that...
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My Reaction When The Timberwolves Made The Playoffs
Sometimes a blog post doesn’t need too many words. 14 years without making the playoffs. We finally did it. Yeah we’ll probably get swept by the Rockets. Who cares? I feel like that 105 year old man...
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